At the close of business today, the Church updated its advice document, “Preventing and Responding to Abuse.” As described by the Deseret News, the major changes are the following language:
• “Members should never be encouraged to remain in a home or situation that is abusive or unsafe.”
• “When a member of a stake presidency or bishopric or another assigned leader meets with a child, youth, or woman, he or she should ask a parent or another adult to be in an adjoining room, foyer, or hall. If the person being interviewed desires, another adult may be invited to participate in the interview. Leaders should avoid all circumstances that could be misunderstood.”
• “Church leaders should never disregard a report of abuse or counsel a member not to report criminal activity to law enforcement personnel.”
• “At least two adults must be present on all church-sponsored activities attended by youth or children.”
These are important changes, and I welcome them. (I wish they had been explicitly stated decades ago, and there’s a lot further to go, but as an initial sign of serious commitment to change, I’ll take it.)
But no change will take root without a blast of widespread attention, coupled with consistent future education and follow-up. We don’t just need to change policy, we need to change cultural norms.
The Salt Lake Tribune reports that these instructions were sent out to Priesthood leaders (branch president level and higher) via letter. The actual letter was sent as information to the Priesthood only — its not a read-over-the-pulpit letter to entire congregations. It does contain instructions to share with the entire Ward Council and auxiliary leaders. But it concerns me a bit that the letter was not directly sent to those with the stewardship to inform the prime beneficiaries: Relief Society Presidents, Young Women’s Presidents, Young Men’s Presidents, and Primary Presidents. (Those leaders also do not have have access to Handbook I, where several changes will be formally reflected.)
So let’s change the limited distribution by raising awareness. I propose everyone who reads this should email a note to their entire ward leadership, informing them of the change and requesting further action. Here’s a sample draft you’re more than free to steal and/or modify:
* * *
Dear [Leaders],
You may have seen that the Church just issued updated guidance on how to handle abuse. I know this week is General Conference, but I feel it is important to ensure that all our leaders know of this change, and are prepared to remark on and implement it when regular meetings resume next week.
It’s tragic, but statistics show abuse is far more common than we realize. This devastating reality is likely affecting members within our own ward, right now. I would therefore recommend we inform all members of the ward of Church policy on abuse, including these changes. We should particularly instruct the youth that they have the right to choose a second adult (such as a parent or other youth leader) to attend any interview or meeting with a leader — and that the exercise of that choice is encouraged.
I believe it would also be beneficial to take this opportunity to reiterate our commitment to making the Church a safe community. For anyone who has been a victim of abuse in the past, in the present, or the future, the ward family should publicly resolve to offer its complete support. Perhaps we could schedule a professional therapist to offer a Fifth Sunday or other lesson(s) on this topic? Maybe abuse and relationships could be a dedicated subject of Come Follow Me lessons in Relief Society or Youth Sunday School?
I look forward to our continued teachings and emphasis that the Gospel of Jesus Christ calls us to develop healthy, respectful, and loving relationship skills — including by setting appropriate boundaries, and refusing to tolerate abuse in any form.
Please let me know how I can help,
[Your Name]